kronoskingofthemonkeypeople:

the doctor spend 900 years in trenzalore
900 years in one place
and 900 in constant battle
thinking he’s going to die

then clara returns and above all odds he’s gifted another regeneration cycle

but now he’s old
and grumpy
and he hasn’t done the normal doctor thing for a hella long time
he doesn’t know who he is
even clara isn’t sure

they clash
she tells him off
he tries to make amends
tries to be the good man
he thinks he’s failed
but clara thinks it’s the trying that counts

and so it does
he accepts he’s an idiot

but he thinks clara’s moved on
he’s not he handsome hero
his cover came down for her
and she chose someone else
so he lies
he continues to be an idiot
he lets her go

but then he gets a second chance
he never gets that
the universe never grants him that
yet there she is

no more time for lying
they hit the jackpot

but it doesn’t take a time lord to know how this will end
his second chance will be taken away again
his teach
his guiding light
his carer
she can’t last forever
and he can’t take it

so he crosses the line he drew to save her
because screw the universe he can do anything
he deserves this one small thing
he will get what he wants
no matter the cost

he stops being the doctor

but then clara

always clara

no more lies

tell the person how you feel

be a good man

be the doctor

he may not remember her smile
but he remembers that
it is part of him now
and everything he does

the impossible girl from under his childhood bed

so when he meets river
he loves
he accepts the end
he embraces the moment
he wears the hell out of the red velvet jacket

he is the doctor