Slow Heal

unstable-reality:

Quiiiick one-shot. Jyn and Cassian, in the morning, from Cassian’s POV, with a little angst about Feelings. NSFW.

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Waking up beside Jyn was still new enough for Cassian to find it strange.

She wasn’t there, most mornings, even now. Their shifts and assignments didn’t always align, and he had the feeling that, sometimes, she wanted to be alone. He could well understand that. On those mornings, when all was as it had been for many, many years – when the first thing he saw was a wall or a rack curtain, and the first thing he heard was the ambient noise of the base, and the first thing he felt was the emptiness of his solitude – he took the old comfort from it. He was home, it meant. He was not using or lying to anyone, and he was not compromising his sense of self.

That was changing. Slowly. Now, there was a prickle of disappointment, too, and it was growing.

He blinked. The light was low. There was no sun, here. He saw her: undressed and on her side, facing him, arms drawn together and inward, in a protective pose. He heard her: the long, gentle rushing of her breaths. He felt her: the warmth of her body, the places where parts of her pressed against parts of him. There was a moment of surprise. The length and intensity of that moment had been shrinking, as time went on.

Strange. But he was starting to expect this.

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