it’s just good politics ( you’re more than a pretty face ) Ch 7

melanoradrood:

Rebelcaptain Modern Bodyguard Fic
Word Count: 8311
Rating: Mature
Warnings: There’s angst, there’s flangst, there’s angst, there’s a cliffhanger! 

She’s throwing him out. She’s kicking him out of her place, out of her life.

He refuses to look at the box, just gets himself dressed, takes one last glance around the room, hopes it isn’t the last time he sees it. He looks at the bed, where just the night before, he had told her he had loved her with his movements, with the way he kissed her, the way he touched her. He loves her, and he can’t leave without knowing she knows that.

Stepping into the living room, he sees that Jyn is dressed, wearing a black dress with gray lines across it, and she looks beautiful, looks amazing, with her hair in a low bun, and the necklace from earlier, it’s around her neck. She’s wearing those boots that she had worn at the bar when she beat up her attackers, and he wants to kiss her, needs to kiss her –

She looks up at him and there’s a brief moment where she smiles, like she likes what she sees, and she stands up, takes two steps towards him… and then she pauses. He knows what she’s doing. She’s overthinking. She’s pushing him away. She’s creating distance.

Fuck this. Fuck that. He can’t let her. He won’t let her.

Striding across the room, Cassian cradles her face in both hands, tilting her face up to kiss him. He’s a little rough, he knows that, but she could easily kick his ass, push him away, stop him, but instead, she grabs onto him, grabs the front of his jacket, pulling him close. He kisses her hard, like he loves her, like he needs her, because he can’t imagine a life that isn’t filled with her.

When she pulls away, her eyes are filled with tears, and she’s looking down, away from him.

“We need to go,” she whispers, and he nods, swallowing down every protest he has in his body.

Instead, he presses her lips to her forehead, and closes his eyes as his arms go around her. She doesn’t push away, just letting him hold her.

“We can talk about whatever it is when we get home,” he promises.

He’s pretty sure he’s not coming back here, not coming back with her, and it crushes him when she freezes for a moment, then nods against his chest. They’re lying to themselves… Lying to themselves, because it’s easier, and he doesn’t know how to fix this, but he has a few hours to figure it out before she shuts the door on him for forever.

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