I Have to Leave (But I Will Always Come Back) by @sleepykalena

Jyn and Cassian have been together for three years, but now that Cassian is on his third deployment, Jyn has to deal with the fact that she has to spend yet another Christmas alone.

Cassian stood up and took her face in his hands. “Please say you understand and mean it,” he pleaded, his eyes searching hers for some level of understanding.

Instead of looking him straight in the eye, Jyn had shut herself back into her memories as her eyes were downcast; she remembered the face of her father, and their final exchange before he was practically ripped away from her, her family torn apart and broken.

She opened her mouth, took a breath, and looked up at Cassian’s eyes. “I understand,” she said again, but the words felt hollower in her head as she recited them.

It took her two weeks to learn that if she buried herself in her work, she could make herself so tired that she’d pass out on the couch and not think too hard about how cold their bed had become since his deployment.

Read this at @sleepykalena‘s AO3 here

As a military brat myself, I definitely identified with Jyn’s struggle of being the one left behind. This story conveys both Jyn’s sadness and the way she throws herself into being busy and Cassian’s regret at what he has put them through. The love between the characters may go through ups and downs but it’s tangible and I love this so much! 11/10