clarafiers:

twelve staring at the nothing that could have been home

the bleak black shadow that was absolutely nothing

not home

not hope

not even a glimpse

nothing. it was nothing.

twelve unable to hide what hurt and smashing the console again and again and again, not saying a word, not needing to say or scream a thing, just smashing whatever he could get his hands on because that’s what’s been done to him

he had hope, he always has to have hope, and it’s taken away

and he prepares himself for lies and let downs, he prepares himself for future upsets and disappointments, he prepares himself to look once more into that empty horrible nothingness

and that’s why he’s got such a charming face on when he sees clara again

he’s put on a face

he’s wearing a veil

both of them are

but the veil vanishes entirely when they’re in each other’s arms ;_;7 and only we and santa can see it